Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Day 7,later

I seem to be a day late now in posting but I am writing it all in the day for which the time fits.
Here is Day 7 (I know on day 8 but it is valid) and I will make day 8 soon.

Ok so I started this earlier and now am waiting for my first class of the day to begin. Is this a good time to tackle that elephant? Before a fun time getting people to gain some confidence to talk in a language they have been told they suck at? I am going to try.
Last night after I finally made it up the stairs I got undressed to take a shower. As part of all this rearranging and changing and addressing myself I have had to be as honest at possible with me. At times times this is hard as everyone knows, because some of these things have been around for a very very long time.
So I had stripped off and happened to take a few minutes to look at me in the mirror. Yes this is not such an attractive sight and is something I usually avoid and so it was confronting for that reason alone. The elephant showed up then.
I have many scars from so many surgeries and the latest ones were done last year in Germany when I had the Lumbo-Peritoneal shunt and valve put in place. I was looking at where the valve is sited because it has been kind of sore and itchy of late. I have a large bulge above the scar. It was not there a few days ago.
What is it? Now this is a good question because unless I go to the hospital and have x-rays etc I cannot say. It does hurt and it is not comfortable to move.

I can hear you. "Tanya, go to the Drs". I have no money and no insurance and so this is not an option. The elephant will remain in the room.

Ok it has been addressed and I am now mid-class and having a good time (not so sure about my lovely students. They remind me of scared rabbits).

Will hopefully post more later.
Love and Hugs to all

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Thank you for your comments. I really appreciate them.Love and hugs to all. Tanya